Truly Thankful............

And her heart was content.......

The table was festively seasonal.......

The aromas of fresh herbs and spices filled the air........

The blessings of God's provisions were abundant.....

And she looked around her table of thanksgiving.......filled with family and the promises of tomorrow.....

And she realized how present she was in that moment, in that space.........

With the love of her family.....

And her Father in heaven........

And for these gifts of time, of family, of love.......

She was truly thankful......

And "So Loved......"

In Remembrance..........

I must admit, I was just a wink in my mother's eye 50 years ago today.........

Camelot is only something I have read about........

But this President, not just the devastating loss of him, continues to stir deep emotions in the American people, especially those that were alive while he was in office.........

In my lifetime, thus far, I don't know that there has been a president since that has made this kind of impact on the American people........

My heart goes out to the family of this man, John Fitzgerald Kennedy.........

I pray for the loss of a leader, a husband, a son and a father........

May God bless this family as they remember his life today........

May God bless us, as we look ahead to the future for an American who will lead us with righteousness, honesty, integrity and godliness.........

You're Here....At Last!............

This is a puddle!!!.............

The rain has finally made its arrival here in So Cal and the trees, flowers and plants are so very thankful....

I LOVE rainy days..........

I love the smell and the feel of the rain.........It almost feels detoxing..........washing away the dirt, the dust that mask the beauty of the colors........it's cleansing and healing and restorative........

I am thankful for my Fathers provisions......not just for me but for this beautiful, earthly place.......

I am thankful to see the beauty of the rain, to hear its rhythmic sounds as it falls from heaven, to feel it on my skin and in my soul........

Welcome, rain.......

Our arms are stretched out wide to greet you............

Rain, Rain, "Where are you?"............

Dry.....Dry.....Dry......

So far, So Cal remains precipitation-less...........we, so very much, need some rain........

My forecast app this morning looked like this:

. 

But alas.......not even a drizzle so far........

I beginning to think, with each passing year, that we will eventually become more like Palm Springs....

(Which is not a bad thing....just a hot one).......

I am not a person who, necessarily believes in "global-warming"........I have no educational basis for this reason.......I just think the weather goes through cycles, ebbs and flows, "El Niño and La Niña, etc.......

Do I think we have done some damage to the environment because of emissions and various other pollutants?  Yes.........Do I believe in global warming to the extent that some very outspoken politicians have protested?  No...........

This is not an arena for political views or opinions........just a journal view of my life.....that's all......

Anywho........WE NEED SOME RAIN!

Possibly a rain dance added to my to-do list today!!

(Must google how to do that, later)!

Namaste

"I bow to you"........

I love this......

I love yoga and have not committed to it in a very long time......too long.....

I love the quiet peaceful time, opening up my body to myself......to the world......

I am amazed how healing it is to my soul......and one would be led to believe, that I would MAKE time for this experience, everyday......

But.....life, my jobs, my responsibilities, MY EXCUSES, keep me wishing that I made it apart of my life.....

A dear friend of mine mentioned she was on her way to Yoga yesterday morning......I so wish I could be there with her.......because I love yoga and because she is dear to me......

And as I wished her a wonderful class, I signed off with "Namaste".........

"I bow to you"........

I love this.....I love the statement in the physical and mental sense....."I love you, I respect you, I am in awe of you, I am your servant"........

That's kinda my interpretation of the statement.......this can be said of the day as a whole, to another human being, to the earth, to the practice, etc........

So today, Tuesday, I am yours......I submit myself to what you bring me today.....

I pray for the strength to accept all that you lay before me......

Amen!

The Gifts of Monday.........

Welcome, Monday!.............

May my heart be fully open to submit to your good today.......

May I breathe slowly and work briskly..........

May my words be encouraging and soft spoken.........

May my actions reflect my gratitude for your generous gift of sunlight, time and ability......

May my love be warm and comforting to everyone I cross paths with on this day........

May I be worthy of your presence today........

May I be blessed to meet tomorrow.........

A Joyful Exhaustion..........

Well, four performances later, we are all exhausted.......

But this handsome young man, is always a joy to watch......anywhere, anytime......

I was not a drama student in high school, but I did attend several months of acting school......

I was absolutely terrified to be on stage and have every eyeball in the room on me!......I was petrified and paralyzed with fear up there.......me and theatre were doomed from the beginning.....I was just too painfully shy to overcome my inhibitions.......we broke-up soon after......

But over the years, as I have watched and thoroughly enjoyed experiencing my son's enthusiasm for acting, I must admit that there is something mystical and magical about the theatre.......

You can feel the energy and appreciate the intensity of the moments up there, captivating an entire audience with the emotions and transformation of words.........the costumes and the movements......the sounds and the illusions of it all.......

Yeah, it's pretty amazing........I think I understand the concept and the beauty of the theatre.......Even though we will never rekindle our romance.......(never really qualified as a romance.....more like a painfully overbearing, controlling, terrorizing affliction)........

There is no where in the world I would have rather been these past four days, then watching my son do something he loves.........

His joy....is mine........

The Gifts of Blankets......

TGIF.........

It's been an exhausting week around here for all of us.......

The play every night, school and work the next day, church meetings for my husband, and cupcakes for me........

We are pretty pooped.........

Somehow, I am going to try and stay on task with the other goings on in my life.......homeschool, Thanksgiving, Christmas, my son's wellness (and, of course, the rest of my family, always).........

One of the line items today is to make a few blankets with my daughter for "The Linus Project"......

These finished blankets go to sick children who are in the hospital........

Several years ago, during a middle of the night emergency visit with my daughter, I remember her receiving a beautiful blanket while we were waiting for the doctors.......It touched my heart so much.....

My daughter was scared and tired and so was I......It was such a warm, cozy, comfort to have a blanket she could cuddle and snuggle with.......At the time, I had wished I had gotten one, too!!!! :)

And after that visit, for about 3 years, I crocheted blankets for this organization......

It's been a few years since I have done any, and now I would like to get my daughter involved......

She will not crochet but she will do a fleece "no-sew" blanket.......There are instructions on the website:

ProjectLinus.org

I am hoping these blankets will make a personal connection for her as I continue to find ways to teach her about serving others......

Blessings.....

Push-Pops Cupcakes.......Complete!.....

Here they are.......

"Mud Berry"

"Chai".....

"Oreo".......

Really fun to make......and a bit time intensive........

I have 40 to make each night (4 nights) plus 40 more for the cast on Sunday!..........

There is a lot of sugar around this kitchen this week!.....

Happy Thursday!.......

The Tasks Ahead..........

So....this is the annual month of my middle child's Fall production.......

Every year this month, in addition to being thrilled to see my son perform, I am inundated with some form of baking......

From cookies, brownies, or cupcakes, it's a giant task that takes months of planning.......

Because there are three productions per year, I am always researching for new and fun ideas.......

This year I am trying "push-pop cupcakes"......I know, livin' on the edge, right?

I am making 200+ with three flavors; Oreo, Chai, and Mud Berry........

I have made and cut out all the cupcake parts.....Sunday, I made (hopefully enough) all the buttercream flavors.......Yesterday, I assembled all but the tops of the push-pop containers.......

Tomorrow is the first of four performances.......I will post some pictures tomorrow as I complete them.....

I love baking.......I find great joy in the time and effort of giving these yummy confections......

My heart is full meditating and thinking as I go, of my son.......

I know that now he does not think about me doing these.......I sometimes think it annoys him.....

But someday, I just hope he sees that this was one way of showing him I support him.......of loving him.......always........

It is my life's purpose to be his mom.......

My heart was divinely created to have him in it.......

So, I look ahead to a busy week.......

And my heart will sing with joy for the gifts of being a mom......

For the hands and legs to complete the tasks ahead......

For the eyes to see my son, doing what he loves......

And for the love of my Father in heaven, who so graciously bestowed them all......

The Essence of Joy........

Today, I paid it forward........

I paid for the person's coffee behind me.......Just as someone had so sweetly done for me last week....

It made my heart smile......

I just wish I could have seen the persons face; did it make their day?  What was their reaction?  Will they be moved to do it for someone else?

I hope all of the above is true.........

I hope in the chaos of daily life, the redundant tasks and monotonous chores, this small gesture of kindness, brings a smile to someone's face.......I hope they pause for that moment in time, finding hope in the kindness of others......I hope they are encouraged to lift someone else up, in some small unexpected gesture.......

It was so wonderful to have received it last week......but I must confess; the act of giving it was even better......

I am so thankful for the gifts of small surprises.......

I hope to always be driven to be a gift to others......

That, for me, is the essence of joy........

Thank You For Your Service.....

To all our gracious, brave servicemen....past and present....we honor and salute you!!!🇺🇸

Fun and "Whole"............

Yep.....that's us!!

Our entire family gathered last night for my nephews wedding!!

We had a lot of fun!!!!

My firstborn is in town just for the occasion.........It's going to be so hard to let him go today......He was here for just a blink of a moment......We won't be able to hug him again until mid-December!!! :(

My heart hurts already........

I have said it before but this firstborn child makes our family whole........He is generous and sweet......He is patient and loving.......He is such a gift to his sister who worships his very existence.....

He is a best friend and hero to his brother who's joy is immeasurable and vividly transparent when they are together.....I know he (my middle child) misses his best friend so tremendously...........My heart is so thankful that they have this relationship and this love for each other........It's so amazing to experience......

We are so grateful for this wink of opportunity to hold our son in our arms.......To be "whole" again for a couple days.......

Gosh, we are going to miss him......

"Blessed to be a Blessing"........

Another day....

Up before the sun, padding off to the kitchen for a make-shift meal of some sort.....

Spend less time than I should, talking to my Father in Heaven........

My gratefulness and my petitions of healing, he so graciously hears.....

Check calendar and emails......

Daughter rises; think its going to be a manageable day.....I am thankful......

My Wise Husband, already hard at work.....

My sons room shows signs of life......

Dress, wash, teeth........

Husband drives son, I drive daughter......drop them off at school.......

I pray for the gifts of their education and for their safety when I cannot be with them.....

I yearn for my morning boost.......

I order the regular......the one and only warm beverage I ever order........

The young man at the register says "It's been paid for by the woman that just left."

I am as surprised as I am appreciative and I scan the area trying to locate her......

She is gone.....

This one, small, seemingly small gesture of kindness will stay with me all day......

I am reminded that "I am blessed to be a blessing"..........

And I look forward to tomorrow.......

When I will make an opportunity.......

To bring a surprise and a smile to someone's face.......

This act of kindness.......

What a blessing!

I am so thankful......

The Undone "To-Do" List.........

As I look out my window today, I see my orchard.......the trees calling my name for their fall attention....

Not much is getting done around here......other than, clean clothes, a basically clean house, and food on the table, not much time for anything else........

Our focus and priority has been redirected.......

The trees open their almost barren arms, inviting me.........

Our poor Sadie, she desperately needs a shampoo, but she happily greats me still, with a hug and a smile......

The house trim outside is SO long overdue for some exterior paint........

My windows......Uuugggggg, my windows........showing months of dirt, fingerprints and snail trails.......

But, I am needed in other places for now, and that takes priority......

Everything else must patiently wait.......

As Ms. O'Hara would say, 

"After all.....Tomorrow is another day.".............

It's "Off-the-Chain"........

Today is the kind of day that feels as ordinary as any other day....

But life around here lately feels like at any given moment, the other shoe is going to drop....

Kinda like being on call waiting for your pager to go off (they don't even make pagers anymore, do they?).......

I can only describe it as being "off the chain" .........

It's been very stressful and even more heart-draining.......

On the bright side.....

It's 3:00 in the afternoon, and my heart is beating with normal cadence

And I havent yet broken down in tears....

That is something to be thankful for.....

There is no greater suffering in life, 

Than when the health and wellness of your child is in question....

There is no escaping the dark cloud of gloom that surrounds your every thought....

I just want my child to be healthy and well.....

There isn't anything I wouldnt do to make this so....

I just have to keep praying.....

But mostly....

I just hope he knows we are right by his side through this journey....

Every step he takes, we take with him....

And even more so........

I just hope he knows how desperately we love him.....

How much we prayed for the gift of him, 16 years ago.....

How thankful we are to be his parents....

What a blessing he is to this family....

Don't give up, beautiful boy......

Don't ever give up.....

Just one foot in front of the other.....

One day at a time.....

Just one day...

Just

Today......

And, We Raise Our Swords.......

This is the day the Lord has made......

With intensity and fervor, I grovel 

with petitions to my Father for his healing favor...

My husband reminds me

That to fully trust Him

I must relinquish ALL my armour

And let the power be completely His.

My husband's truth stings my focus

He words so clear, so strong

But my heart aches for the soul

That my arms cradle and yearn to protect.

The blood that flows from me to him

Is impossible for my being to seperate.

But

I will try

Everyday

Every moment

I will try

To trust God with my whole heart

To hand over the shields that bind me

To stand before Him 

With nothing but my cross.

Heal him

Lord.

Heal him

Fill his wounds with your love

Fill his ears with the sounds of your voice

Fill his heart with your love.

Sweep him up 

With your loving, divine hands

To the place you created him

To the only place that can heal him.

My Greatest Nemesis........

My greatest nemesis......

Foe of darkness, destruction and death....

My childhood comrade.....

The vehicle to my Father in heaven...

For my Father,

I am truly Thankful.

Nemesis, 

I have shaken you from my surroundings,

I have armored myself,

With knowledge and healing,

I have wiped you from the soles of my feet

And the cavities of my heart.

And you were there,

Quiet and still,

Lurking in the darkness,

Waiting for weakness,

For opportunity...

My calloused hands and heart,

Testaments to my journey

My resurrection,

My new life...

Yet you remain relentless

Merciless and vengeful..

Determined to destroy.

You seek the souls of the righteous.

The hearts of the faithful.

And here I am....

You reveal yourself, familiar foe,

Your words, your behavior, so predictable..

Yes, 

You are here..

Once again..

My most valuable treasures, you now seek...

My heart unpenatrateable to you now,

You have slowly seeped into my sacred places..

This time

With thunderous power.....

Cowered and shaken, 

I try to regain my footing....

I will NOT allow,

The old battle wounds

To reopen...

I will dust off my armour,

Make new plans of attack,

Prepare my temple body,

Physically and spiritually,

For what lies ahead...

I will try and regain my balance

Remove the fear that engulfs me

Hand over my trust

All of my trust

To the only one who can help me now....

With Him,

I CAN DO ALL THINGS,

Even this...

Even you...

I have been here before,

Standing face to face,

With You,

My Great, Evil One....

I have no intention,

to lose this battle,

This war,

That you insist to not relinquish...

I have no intention to fail,

I will not bend my knees

I will tighten my grip

I will engage the army

That lies within me

And your when your defeat is mine,

I will Praise His Name

you will crawl at my feet

Begging for the mercy,

You have denied me. 

I will proclaim His reign over you

Over all the earth,

That His is the Kingdom

And the Power

And the Glory

Forever and ever!