Marriage, Love and Connectivity.........

I have been married for 21 years.........I forgot to add "to the same man".......It hasn't always been easy.  The last time we "re-connected" ( I will explain this re-connection in another post) we dated for 6 weeks and got engaged.  Six weeks later we were married.  The irony of this is that almost 2 years prior to our final marriage we called off our wedding 6 weeks prior to the date of our nuptials.  Its a long story and I will post later......but fast forward 21 years later and here we are, on a stunningly gorgeous Sunday evening, married, in-love, but connected??  I guess the stress of three children, a failed business that left us devastatingly broke and currently struggling to make ends meet, makes a couple feel sort of...I don't know... stressed.

Seems like we are sometimes just operating in our own world, just treading water, trying to accomplish the daily tasks at hand.  Its hard work....I feel like we are both working harder than we've ever worked....but its just getting harder to feel any confidence in our future.  The stress takes a toll.....mine manifests itself in not taking time to workout and emotionally eating all the wrong things.  

The stress in our lives will evolve at some point to complete financial ruin or, by the grace of God, we will pull ourselves out of this and finally start feeling a sense of more oxygen in the air.  

I have so many things to be thankful for, so many things to feel "connected" to.......watering the trees in our orchard, seeing them all starting to emerge from their winter naps, they are so beautiful........spending two peaceful hours today watching my daughter do what she loves most in the world, ride a horse.......taking care of a my freshman who has been feeling awful since Friday........doing the mundane chores around the house that let my husband know he is loved and appreciated and can come home to a clean abode.......thankful my little Mom is feeling well today.......thankful my firstborn is safe at college and enjoying it so much

I am so thankful to be a child of God........perhaps I just need to take more time to "connect" with Him to feel the safety, reassurance and confidence that He has a plan for me, for us......and that we have everything we need today........and that we are loved!