My Pony's Bellyache............

It's all about this guy...........

Things I've learned recently............

Ponies get bellyaches.........all kinds of bellyaches, really........big ones and small ones.......the constipation kind and the stomach acid kind..........

This furry friend will be receiving a gastroscope tomorrow........

After three bellyaches in a short period of time, the vet suggested he take a look.........

It's three feet down to get a peak through a scope........

They tell me I am hoping for an ulcer........not crazy expensive to treat and manage..........unlike other bellyaches, I guess........

Anyway, I have been researching "equine ulcers" ever since........

Learned he will probably be on a Zantac sort of management and we should also,be offering him Tums before every ride.......

Who knew?............

These beautiful creatures are unbelievably strong and wise........yet equally stressed and digestively challenged.......They are sensitive and keenly intuitive with positively remarkable sensory awareness......

They are eager to please and are devotedly loyal partners..........They are unshakenly trustworthy and meaningfully harmless............

They are so much more than just horses.....

They are best friends, teachers, care takers, forgivers, companions, partners, therapists, comedians, life coaches, confidants, heart lights, dream makers, healers........

I love this video about this very subject.......

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=-I9EZtrBPFc

Talking Sad........

I came into this show at the end of this entire, collective series........

I wish, looking back, that I had listened to the enthusiasm of my sons and husband about this show.....

I didn't think it would suit my interests at all, for obvious reasons........

I am so sad this show is ending tonight......

I am devastated that the two main characters did not both win Emmys for their incredible portrayal of these men......

Following Jesse Pinkman over all these episodes has been my favorite.......I love the many facets of what makes Jesse breathe and he makes you want to wrap your arms around him and tell him he is loved.......

Heisenberg, I mean Walter White.....is, of course, the leading man......Once a confirmed, geeky science teacher  now transformed into a fearless, dark leader of a world I will never know.....thankfully......

I am looking forward to watching tonight FINAL show........

I am sad my firstborn is not with us but glad he is enjoying it with his friends.....

Thankful, anytime, I get to spend time with my other son and husband, doing anything......

It will be epic tonight!

Enjoy..........

The Rhythm of Us........

Well, in two days, my firstborn will be on a plane heading back to school........

This does not get any easier.........

There is a certain rhythm a family has, day to day, meal to meal, annoyance to annoyance.........

When he is not here, the rhythm has a different beat, it's not worse, it's just different.......

And I love the sound of us when we are all together........

So we are devouring every extra second we have with this band member....

We just love him and are going to miss him in huge amounts.......

I hope he will check in on us now and then while he is setting his books on fire......

I hope he know how very much we cherish him and are supporting him, especially now.......

I hope he knows how proud we are of him........

And that our love goes with him everywhere he goes....and everywhere we are.......

That rhythm will never change.......

It's a beat he can ALWAYS count on.......

"Espirito de Gozo"..........

The Spirit of Joy..........

This is what our church sermon was about today.......

We have a sister church in El Salvador and 29 members of our church spent 10 days there this summer.......

They spoke today of the unexpected blessings that they received.....

They traveled with loving hearts to serve this sister church yet what they came home with were gifts beyond what they had even presupposed.....

changed hearts and new perspectives about their own good fortunes....

Graciousness........

It is so difficult to live in the "Spirit of Joy" when everything around us seems to be crumbling........

When our relationships are suffering, our livelihood is depleting, our health is dwindling, our hope and future seem unretrievable.........

But to hear the words of these travelers this morning warms my heart and moves my steps...one foot in front of the other.....forward.....with hope.....

I cannot possibly imagine what these people in El Salvador have suffered and endured during this 3 1/2 decade long civil war........

Their experience, their words, their hope and their joy speak to the true faith they live every day.....

I long to mirror their courage and their hope in our Father.......to trust Him above all else, even in the midst of unimaginable chaos.........when everyday survival resides in our very breath.......

I yearn for that kind of faith and that kind of true joy..........

I am learning.....

Everyday.........

Adieu, Soleil....... ....

Well, Summer, once again it's been wonderful to spend time with you.......

But today, we must say farewell........

Thank you for so generously gracing us with the all encompassing warmth of your visit.....

We will share the fond memories of these past few months, embrace you as you leave us, and find comfort that you will return in June........

May you return, to your seasonal habitat, in sound slumber and rest contentedly.......

Until we meet again.........

Adieu, soleil ................

Taking Stock..........

“If you surround yourself with the good and righteous, they can only raise you up. If you surround yourself with the others, they will drag you down into the doldrums of mediocrity, and they will keep you there, but only as long as you permit it.” 

― Mark Glamack

This is a great quote about those whom we choose to surround ourselves with.....

It is, after all, a choice........to be amongst people who lift us up, whom encourage us and challenge us to be healthy, well, successful and righteous.....

That doesn't mean not to minister and serve those who are in need........not at all.........

But the friends whom we choose to spend our free time with, our down time, should make us take pause.....take stock.......

I think this comes intrinsically to some........but not to others......

Sometimes people are not as transparent as they seem..........They put us in harm's way, cause us to question our own good judgement and to squelch that quiet voice inside, God's voice, clarifying right from wrong........

It takes great strength to make righteous choices sometimes........Sometimes they can cause us heartache or hardship.........Sometimes we have to leave people behind so that we can move forward in a different direction........

We battle our sinning hearts that want us to act on "feelings" or "emotions" ........Our humanness wants us to do what "feels good" and maybe not what is the "right" choice.........

I pray for the strength of those I love to bravely soldier on and ask God for help.......To desire to makes choices that directly reflect the amazing plans God intends for their lives........

Being off track and encountering one problem after the other, should cause us to evaluate our actions, choices and the people whom surround them.......

Maybe it's time, finally, to make some changes.........

Is it Safe to Come Out Today?...............

My husband texted me this morning while my daughter was riding, "How's the morning going?".........

Yesterday wasn't an easy one........

The morning started with rounds of complaints......about everything......

After a full school day, my final, sweet child was not ready for homework with her tutor......Especially when I just happened to mention she would be studying for her science test on Friday.......I triggered a major meltdown.......

My final child, with the helpful blessing of her tutor, managed to pull herself together and complete her homework and studying with vigor and positivity.......So proud of her.......

Sometimes I think it's me......I just don't think it through, my words.......My intentions are to help her........but sure enough the method of delivery gets lost in the translation.......her translation.......and the meltdown, invariably ensues..........my fault........

Is it safe to come out today?.........

I wonder if that is me or her asking that question.......

A Work In Progress........

Self reflection.........

This morning I had an unusual window of open time..........

Breathing time I had not planned on...........These, sometimes, are the most refreshing.......

I have always known that I am not the most emotional girl.......not one to be quick on tears or a sense of humor.........sometimes to a fault........

But I also have always recognized that I am hyper-sensitive on occasion to unnecessary things, comments, gestures, etc........sometimes to a fault........

I have been trying to connect where that sensitivity comes from.....to be in touch with the feeling in the moment that it bubbles up........and I think it's beginning to reveal itself...........

Abandonment......

I think I am terrified on many days, in many moments, of being abandoned........

I will refrain from psychoanalyzing this.......I do not blame anyone, especially my parents......

But I do think, because my parents were divorced when I was 5, that some of it comes from those foundational days of my childhood......

I won't speak again of my father......I did that in 1 post awhile back and that was enough.......but he chose to not have a relationship with my brother and I who are both from this early marriage........

So yeah.....there is some of it.......

I had a boyfriend, only one really, other than my husband......I dated some but nothing very long term with exception of this first one (7 1/2 years)........

There is so much to say about that relationship but I dont know if I will ever have the courage to delve into it........Lets just say no one would ever want their daughter dating someone like him...EVER......

I hear he has a daughter now, same age as mine, and I am confident God has a purpose for that......I am hoping he has learned over the years, how to educate his own daughter about how NOT to be treated.......about what is an acceptable and unacceptable relationship and boyfriend behavior.....

I pray that is the case......I have long moved on from those years and don't look back.......

But...yeah....there is some more of the abandonment issues........

Anyway.....I am thankful for the unexpected moments this morning to reflect on these things.....

I continue to try and define some of my personality traits and weaknesses and why they exist.....

I am a work in progress........

And So It Goes.......

We have some weather relief today in So Cal.........

It's a little cooler and there is even a breeze here this afternoon at the WiseAcre........

Homework is happening at the moment and there is a yummy aroma of chicken something in the crockpot.........

It's hard to believe September is halfway complete and October is just around the bend........

Really...Where does the time go?.......

My firstborn leaves next week to go back to complete his junior year at University........That amazes me even more. I feel like it was yesterday that we dropped him off at the dorm, with aching hearts and leaking eyes.......We missed him and still do when he is not here.......desperately.  He is an easy, quiet soul who is just a pleasure to be with.  I can't wait to meet the girl who captures his heart and realizes what a treasure he is.  He is a gentleman and a gentle man who will be a loyal, devoted husband and an even more extraordinary father.....(Not now, ppppllleeeaaaazzzzeee, but when the time comes) :)

My middle child has successfully caught his first virus of the school year....ALREADY.......We are doomed........

So.......steady as she goes for a Tuesday at the WiseAcre......

And so it goes..........

Navigating the Homeschool Adventure........

Ahhhhh.......the adventures of homeschooling.......

We are almost, officially, one month into our home educational journey and we love it!.....

Well......mostly......

I am getting up a lot earlier than I used to when we went to traditional school and getting to sleep later also........that equals longer days.........

Yeah, I'm exhausted.........

But it's a different kind of tired than I used to be........

Last year my daughter would be in tears before we even left the school parking lot.......on a lot of days........

it was really hard.......

This kind of tired is the not the stress and worry kind, although there is still plenty of that, but the task kind......

My days are full and my lists are long:

Teaching, lesson planning, grading/correcting papers, record keeping, managing homework and time with the tutor......that's just school....

There is her riding, orthodontist, confirmation, and doctor appointments.......

Did I mention I have two other children??

I have a house to care for, with an orchard......personal and business accounts to reconcile, and a darling dog to attend to.......

Did I mention that I need to make my health a priority?

Anywho, it's a lot and sometimes overwhelming.......my husband often talks me off the ledge at the end of a long day when all seems completely unmanageable.......he's very good at reminding me to keep it all in perspective and that EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK.......I love that about him.....

But I wouldn't trade homeschooling for what we did last year for anything.......

I wouldn't trade this time with my daughter for anything in the world........( ok, I have to be honest here.......I might trade the moments when she rolls her eyes at me and complains about EVERYTHING)

Overall, she is SO much happier and I am SO much happier for her..........

We still have lot to figure out and get in sync but I know we can do it...........

I am grateful and so thankful to be able to have this time with her.........

I pray for continued courage and strength to navigate this adventure of ours.......

I also pray for smooth seas ahead..........

The Doers.........

“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; . . . who at best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.” —Theodore Roosevelt

I love this quote........

I think about it when I find myself in the presence of people who are quick to judge.........

I hope I have modeled to my children that I am a doer.........That I am not afraid to do the real work....the hard work, even if it doesn't turn out how I hoped.......be it emotional or physical.....Even if, to others, my fruitless attempts were not worthy of the doing......

I hope my children see the example my husband and I have tried to model about "showing up" and "giving it everything you've got".......because what else is there, really?.........

Everyday we wake up, most days before the sun, and begin again........doing the same thing over again, perhaps in new ways, with new ideas, with new visions.......

But the work is the same.......

Many times it feels like three steps forward and two steps back......sometimes visa versa.............

But what I hope they see is that we will NEVER give up........

It is our Father's love for us and the gifts of this life that drive us.........

Our children are those precious gifts..........

And the drive is bred out of the love and thankfulness for this life and those gifts......to love Him and them.......together.......always........

All three of our children work hard and have embraced the gifts and talents God has given them.....

My firstborn is learning the tenacity it takes to stay focused, to stay on the path to get to the finish line.......

He's learning to reach deep inside, to self sacrifice for a bigger goal......

I am proud of him for his intrinsic desire to finish strong.....no matter what it takes.....

My middle child is learning resistance........learning that instant gratification never leads to true happiness......he is learning that strengthening his conviction will lead to greater success........that success takes daily organization and daily tending...........

I am proud of his creativity and his leadership..........I am proud of his willingness to recreate himself and die to his old ideas and be made new.........

My youngest child has lived hard work in a way that I will never know.........She lives her life like a soldier, winning war after war.......battle after battle........against the odds........

She desperately wants to accomplish greatness........and in so many ways, she has summitted unbelievable adversity........and continues to soldier on............

We are only as great as the work we do.........the fear we face.........the obstacles we hurdle over.........

At the end of the day, as we wipe our brows and lay our bodies down for the night, we meet the next day with the same intent.......

To serve God, to love with our whole hearts, to live thankfully in all things.......

To be doers in this life, focused on living in the fullness of our hearts and bodies.......

To feel the marrow of our bones ache with a hard days work........

To love with our entire being.......

To demonstrate thankfulness.......

Amen

Have an Easy Fast..........

“For on this day He will forgive you, to purify you, that you be cleansed from all your sins before God” (Leviticus 16:30).

I have mentioned on several occasions how much I appreciate and respect some of the Jewish traditions and observances........

Yom Kippur begins a few minutes before dusk and ends tomorrow, 24 hours later, just after nightfall during Tishrei.......

I have spent sometime reviewing my understanding of this most holy day:

Yom Kippur commemorates the day when God forgave the Jewish people for the sin of the Golden Calf. Forty days after hearing God say at Mount Sinai, “You shall not have the gods of others in My presence; you shall not make for yourself a graven image,” the Jews committed the cardinal sin of idolatry. Moses spent nearly three months on top of the mountain pleading with God for forgiveness, and on the tenth of Tishrei it was finally granted: “I have pardoned, as you have requested.”

From that moment on, this date, henceforth known as the Day of Atonement, is annually observed as a commemoration of our special relationship with God, a relationship that is strong enough to survive any rocky bumps it might encounter. This is a day when we connect with the very essence of our being, which remains faithful to God regardless of our outward behavior.

And while it is the most solemn day of the year, we are also joyful, confident that God will forgive our sins and seal our verdict for a year of life, health and happiness.

As Christians we are called to "die to sin" daily...to wake up everyday renewed in the spirit of our baptism.......We are called to confess our sins and repent but to trust that we are forgiven by the grace and mercy of God........

But what a blessing it would be to spend an entire day focused on our wrong doings and then celebrate and rejoice in our forgiveness.......

I love it.........

And as much as the very essence of my faith lies in the fact that Jesus died on the cross and gave his life for me so that I may live eternally with our Father in heaven, I can't help but be envious of the observance and celebration of this holy day.........

May those who observe this festival be blessed by the presence of God amongst them.......

May their "fast be easy"..........

May the year ahead bring them a great abundance of joy, health and peace......

A Most Invaluable Day........

There just aren't any words that I can think of to write here to give this day the justice it deserves........

That morning changed every one of us.......some so painfully more than others......

My heart aches for the loss of those whose lives were selfishly taken this day........

And the irony, for me, is what lies in what was won that day.........

The beauty in the community of US........

United...

Standing together, so bravely, giving and reaching out to our brothers and sisters......

And through the painful memories and the invaluable losses, may we forever remember the strength and endurance that remains in this great country of ours.......

We hang our heads in sorrow today......

But we also remember to count our blessings.......

We remain strong.......

We remain free.....

We remain united........

In His Time, In His Truth......

We journey together, separate, but not apart.......

We yearn for the righteous knowledge of our Father who loves us in spite of our fear of the unknown.....

We have been called to gather His teachings with new lenses.....

To read between the words that were written because He loves us.....

To be inspired by the truth of the Holy Spirit who is alive, breathing life into the literal comprehension....

Together, in His time and His truth, we will love each other with the mercy and grace that He has shown us thus far, in this earthly life.....

We will uncompromisingly embrace our Fathers love believing that we will end up in His arms, together, no matter where we praise His name.....

Because He dwells within us, no matter where we are, but especially when we are united for His purpose....

Your Lantern Light..........

We had a sermon this morning that has been sitting in my heart all day.......

It was the story of a wealthy man who wanted to build a church........

He wouldn't allow anyone to see the plans or to go inside until it was absolutely complete.......

When that day came, the people folded in and were in awe of what they experienced.......The church was a feast for the eyes.......It was not only stunning to look at but had everything you could imagine........there wasn't a detail left out........

And as they took in the beauty of that place they noticed that there were lanterns in every seat of the church.........

Perplexed, they asked "Why?"..........

And the wealthy man answered...."Everytime you come to church, I want you to bring a lit lantern.  It will symbolize the light that every single member brings to this church.  When you do not come to church, there will be noticeable darkness.  God notices when you are not here.  The church depends on the light of every member to keep it alive and bright."

I loved this........

I can picture that beautiful church in my mind.........I can picture the journey to that church with my lit lantern in hand.........I can see the glow of the lantern light as I walk through its sanctuary doors......

It's beautiful imagery of the way we work together.........

My husband and I are wrestling with some questions lately about our own church........

We have been seeking counsel and knowledge as we try and make the best decision for ourselves and for our family..........

My husband's family has a long history in this church which has an impact on his loyalty and devotion to his foundational teachings........

My family has a long history in another denomination but I decided to convert before marriage to his......

We are currently at a crossroads of where God is leading us........

But are prayerful and certain He will lead us home.......

With our lanterns in hand, we continue to walk this journey with God as our guide........

I long to open the doors of that place, where my lantern illuminates and flickers in unity with my brothers and sisters......

Where, together, the light and the warm of that place fill my soul and bring me peace......

Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in heaven.

Matthew 5:16

Can You Spell H*E*A*T W*A*V*E?................

It's baking hot here in So Cal........

The past few days have just been awful........

We have been so thankful to have had such a mild summer up until this week.......

The days are full, once again, with church meetings, back-to-school nights, and homework......I miss summer already......

But although I miss the looser days, the homework-free days and the lighter calendar, I do crave the monotonous rigidity of the school year.......

I like calendars......I love planning ahead and the art of preparation.......I love knowing what's coming next.........I love productivity.......It helps keep me grounded and lessens my anxiety of the unknown.....

I am a "task oriented" sort of human.....I love making lists, efficiency and organization...........

I am also very aware of time......I think I have at least once clock in every room........I pride myself on my punctuality.......I think time is the most precious gift any of us posses and to waste it, especially someone else's, is a terrible shame........

There are a million things that need to get done outside (and in)...........but they are the bigger projects that need bigger allotments of precious time that I don't seem to have an abundance of at the moment........I hope that changes, just a little bit, in the next few weeks.......

The heat is definitely keeping me inside and biting at the bit to get my shovel dusted off and in the soil....

Lets hope it cools off soon......

Yikes.....

The Abundance of Blessings.........

Today I presented a dear friend of mine this pomegranate...........

I gave it to her with this prayer:

"May the abundance of seeds from this fruit represent the abundance of blessings today, and for the coming year."

Today is Rosh Hashanah........Although I am a Christian and do not necessarily celebrate all the Jewish holidays or traditions, I have great respect for them.  Some of them I wish we would celebrate and uphold as Christians........

Today, in my understanding, is the celebration of the day God made the world.  The end of the old and thus the New Year ahead............A day to look forward to the hopes of the blessings of the coming year and preparation for Yom Kippur, the tradition of atonement........

I am envious of these.......I wish Chrsitians, as a whole, would take more time and intention to meditate on these things........

What a blessing......

Wishing and praying especially for my friend today but for us all as we look ahead to the hopes of what is ahead, of what is in store........

May we be mercifully and graciously blessed by our Father in heaven.......

Amen.......

The XY's....................

So..........final child, my delicious daughter, enthusiastically enters my cab...I mean car...and announces that she has met some new friends!..........

"Yes", I shout with an equal amount of exclamation.........

She continues, "I met them in science!  We were laughing so hard while we were doing these really fun experiments in class" she shared.

"Oh, and we had lunch together, too" she added...............

"I knew you would meet a ton of new friends" I told her.............."What are their names" I asked.......

"Ben and Cameron" she answered, without even a flinch!

So...........

The days has come.  The dear, sweet baby daughter of my heart, has now discovered that the members of the opposite sex are, in fact, not yucky...........

My husband is in so much trouble...........

Sunbathing in So Cal........

It's been unusually hot here lately.........Really stifling..................

We are keeping the lights off, the shades and curtains drawn and trying to stay hydrated and deodorized...........

Our bulldog is breathing heavier and walking like she doesn't want to expel one more ounce of energy than she absolutely has to..........

My daughters pony hasn't felt well either..........This picture is actually post tummy ache.........This is him feeling much more comfortable and just catching some rays this morning........Yeah, horses do that........

Sounds like we will be cooling off for a couple days only to heat up again on Wednesday............Uuggg!

I am so ready for Fall.....the cooler crisp mornings, the shorter days and my Uggs...........I love those things..........I could sleep in mine..........

Here's hoping that our sunbathing days are almost over for 2013...........

And we can turn the lights back on, open the curtains and turn off the A/C...........Dust off our coats and scarves (and our Uggs, too) and drink more hot chocolates, peppermint lattes or hot apple ciders..........

Get out the pumpkin decor, the scarecrows and the flannel sheets.......

Wait..........that means the holidays are coming.........

Oh Yikes!!!!!

Only 114 more shopping days till Christmas.......................

Does it ever end???